Why I'm No Longer Talking To White People About Race

*insert 
'you're so racist to white people' 
comment here*

"We're living in a post-racial society."
"I don't see colour."
"You're exaggerating."

I am not writing this for white people. I am writing this for catharsis.

The acceptance I am not going to please everyone, especially those whose ideas are already set. I am too SJW, too PC, too feminist. I've become so desensitized that they aren't insulting anymore. I find those people ignorant.

I'm making mountains out of molehills. It's not a big deal. Stay quiet, stay complicit.

"You're doing this for attention."

It's scary to know you feel different because you are different.

They don't see color because they never needed to confront their race. Worried that the color of their skin affects reality's perception of them and vice-versa. I walk a dangerous line every day, trying to fit in without erasing my Muslim and Asian identity - just enough that I don't get called a terrorist on the streets anymore.

"No, you're prettier without your hijab."
"Take that thing off."
"You don't really believe, do you?"

I hear people comment at the expense of us. My first reaction is to shout and cause a scene. Instead, my lips are tight and they stay silent. I can't challenge people who have made up their mind. It cannot always be me who educates the uneducated. It's mentally exhausting to explain basic human morality to people who don't want to listen anyway.

When someone looks at me, they think Asian. They think immigrant. They think 'you don't belong here.'

That's fine. I don't want a place that doesn't want me.

For my law modules and my own commitment to read books written by women of colour this year, I've been reading intersectional feminist literature. One book that came highly recommended was Why I'm No Longer Talking To White People About Race by Reni Eddo-Lodge. The stories of Black struggles in the UK hidden in history.

I am not black. I will never learn fully understand their struggles in an ever-divided society, but I can relate. The colonization of Brunei, the White Rajah of Sarawak, and the lasting effects of colonialism. We will never know a life without British invasion because we still reel in the effects.

The past is the past, but we are still affected now. That doesn't change. Systematic oppression and casual racism still strong, and the rise of racially-motivated attacks are ignored by the public. I can't keep screaming or else I'd lose my voice.



There's no point to this post. It was written after finish a good book, and having one too many conversations where there was no conclusion. Rather than attempting to reaffirm bias, stop instead. Challenge the bias and listen to the minority.

I will start talking when white people start listening.